I'd like to get his autograph, but he looks too much like Dave.
Everytime I read the phrase “We regret to inform you blah blah” I think it secretly finishes with, “except that one asshole who was like, ‘YESSSSSS’.”
Hello shorts weather, good to have you back! What’s that? You can only stay the weekend? But I thought -
No, sorry. There’s someone else. I wish you could stay longer, but it’s time.
I am not being cold, I’m being pragmatic! Please, don’t make this any more difficult. Hey, come back, don’t just storm out of the house like that!
I know you’re upset but that doesn’t mean you can throw your bermuda shorts at me!
Huh? Gone… probably won’t be back for a while.
Excuse me while I go drown myself in pumpkin spice products.
IT’S ALWAYS TEA TIME!